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Porn: In your home and available 24-7

By DAVID MYERS
Southwest Kansas Register

The speaker started out with a warning: “Today we’re going to get into some really dark stuff.”
She wasn’t kidding. Mary Anne Layden, PhD, one of two keynote presenters at the annual Stewardship Conference at the Cathedral of Our Lady of Guadalupe Aug. 24, gave a no-holds-barred talk on the prevalence of pornography and its ease of availability to anyone of any age.
“Pornography used to be found in a shady store on a corner somewhere,” she said. “Now porn is mostly on the internet. It’s free and available 24-7.”
Dr. Layden is a psychotherapist and Director of the Sexual Trauma and Psychopathology Program at the University of Pennsylvania. She termed pornography as the new “crack cocaine”. Like any addiction, pornography can create in an addict a desire to find more, and more sexually diverse, activities to meet his growing appetite (While women view porn, it’s far more prevalent among men.). “Porn is hate speech against women, and against men, as well. Men, stop letting this industry spread this hate, this mistrust about you.
“My hope is,” she told those gathered, “that someone will be set on fire today, so we can go back and burn this industry down.”
Viewing pornography has consequences far beyond the objectification of women; it can actually change a person’s mindset. According to Dr. Layden, research shows that many of those most seriously addicted to porn believe that: all men go to prostitutes; all people want sex all the time; and more shockingly, that women enjoy being raped, and that children enjoy sex with adults.
“I feel horror when people come into my office and say, ‘How bad can child porn be if we can get it in the library?’
“If libraries get federal money, they have to block porn from their computers,” she explained. “If they refuse federal money so that they don’t have to filter their computers, we end up paying for it.” In fact, the American Library Association – the oldest and largest library association in the world – is one of the most vocal opponents of computer filters. They maintain that they are simply protecting first amendment rights. The result is that anyone, of any age, may access porn on unfiltered library computers.
Dr. Layden described just a few of the subjects addressed by the innumerable porn websites. Included among the unimaginably perverse sites are those dedicated entirely to children/adult sexual encounters.
Sadly, children aren’t immune from viewing and even transmitting internet porn themselves. The advent of the camera phone has brought with it “sexting” by children, or the transmission of themselves or others in a state of undress.
“Let them know that sexting is illegal,” Dr. Layden stressed. “It’s the distribution of child pornography.
“Children are tech savvy,” she added. “They can access porn on their computer, phone, and even their Playstation [Playstations are capable of being hooked up directly to the internet].”
All of these items can and should be filtered, she stressed, regardless if your children are boys or girls.
“Help them put up barriers. All kids are curious about sex. Give them sex information -- but with values. Tell them that any picture they post online is not going to go away. If you want to be a fine adult, start by being a fine teenager.
“Don’t be your teenager’s best friend,” she continued. “It doesn’t work. Be their parent. They may not like you, but they’ll come back.”
Bishop Emeritus Ronald M. Gilmore once described the way that people recognize sin for what it is, until, repeated enough, it becomes less and less a sin in the person’s mind, until the individual no longer perceives it as an evil. Dr. Leydon said that this is precisely what happens with the sexual addict.
“I guarantee you, the internet can suck in the best men,” she said. “You can’t stop what you’re doing until you admit what you’re doing.”
There is help available. Contact addiction counselor Hattie Stein at (620) 227-1584 or email This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. . See other listings above, right.

Online resources

• Faith and Safety: faithandsafety.org, twitter.com/faithandsafety,
facebook.com/faithandsafety
• Common Sense Media:
commonsensemedia.org
• Facebook Family Safety Center:
facebook.com/safety
• Growing Wireless:
growingwireless.com
• OnGuard Online: onguardonline.gov
• Connect Safely: connectsafely.org
• Wired Safety: wiredsafety.org
• Family Online Safety Insititute:
www.fosi.org
• Pew Institute: pewinternet.org

Help with porn addiction

• Addiction counselor Hattie Stein, (620) 227-1584 or email This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .
• XXXChurch.com
• http://aboutrecovery.com/addiction-treatment/sexual-addiction.htm

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