Help them feel loved

As I continue to reflect on this rally, and I remember the stress leading up to it, the lack of numbers, and the concern of why we are not touching more lives, I move to the main emphasis of this column.

Looking back on the rally, I have begun to wonder if I have lost touch with some of my beliefs and desires.

During the 16 years that I taught, one thing that always bothered me was a teacher who called students by their last name. To me this is disrespectful. I went to great strides to always call the students by their first names. I was not always successful, as there were many days that I did nothing but damage a student’s self-esteem. But to this day, I still strive to show respect by calling someone by their first name.

This, however, is easier said than done. You see, I have a great visual memory, so it is very easy for me to remember faces, but very difficult for me to remember names. Quite often the youth will find me asking for their first name, which I then somehow find a way to forget in the next few minutes. But still, my goal is to be able to call each youth from any parish by their first name. My hope would be that even if we had 900 attending a rally, I would be able to call each one by name. Lofty yes, but a goal none the less.

However, as I look back on this last rally, I have begun to wonder if I lost touch with this goal. Was I more concerned with getting the numbers and getting through the actual event, that I lost touch with why I was doing all of this in the first place? Have I just been going through the motions and not ministering to the youth? I believe to some extent that this is true and I have committed myself to re-center my thoughts on this goal.

Please allow me to explain a little further by asking a question. As adults celebrating our Catholic faith and tradition, how do we welcome our young people? Do we make them feel loved? I ask this because, at least when I stay focused, it is the heart and soul of my ministry.

Msgr. Dale Fushek, the founder of "Life Teen," shared this story once and it really hit home with me. He spoke of when he was a seminarian and part of their responsibility was to teach religion class at one of the parishes. Over the course of the year he became very close friends with one family and their son. This family took him in, had him over for dinners, etc.

After the summer was over and Msgr. Dale had returned to the seminary, the parents of the boy called him and asked him to talk to their son. They said he had stopped going to Mass and was going to some other church. So Msgr. Dale met with the boy and asked him about different teachings of the Catholic Church to see if he could determine why the boy had stopped going to Mass, etc.

What he found was that the boy believed everything the Church taught. So Msgr. Dale asked him why he had stopped attending. The boy simply responded that for 16 years he had been going to Mass every weekend and Holy Day, attending religion class, etc. But for those 16 years, not once did he feel welcomed or loved. Msgr. Dale said that he made the commitment to never have another young person feel the same way.

Leading our young people closer to the Eucharist is our ultimate goal, and I stand firm that this can better be accomplished by making our young people feel welcomed and loved. This is part of our baptismal call. As I continue to serve the diocese in the role of youth minister, I ask you to ponder how your parish reaches out to our young people.