Retired deacon’s new joke book provides humor for clergy

This is a favorite joke of a deacon who has compiled a book of jokes specifically designed for use by the clergy.

But the word "grumpy" is definitely a little-used word in Deacon Don Lowe’s vocabulary, unless it is included in the context of a joke.

At age 91, the retired deacon from St. Bridget Parish in Cheshire, in the Hartford Archdiocese, said a sense of humor has certainly contributed to his longevity,

In an interview with The Catholic Observer, newspaper of the neighboring Diocese of Springfield, Mass., the deacon said he was recovering from triple-bypass surgery when he decided to go through a boxful of jokes he collected over the years. At age 89, he bought a computer and used it to turn the collection into a book: "Deacon Jokes That a Pastor Can Tell — Possibly Even a Bishop." It can be ordered from Amazon.com.

Deacon Lowe wrote the book to give members of the clergy clean jokes and one-liners designed to raise spirits and open doors. All profits from the sales benefit the Hartford Arch-diocese’s diaconate program.

"We’re coming along good," said the deacon. "It’s taken two years and we have $4,000 so far. I hope to make it $5,000."

Since he was a youngster, humor has always played a role in the life of the deacon, who was born in Waterbury in 1914.

"It can help the heart. It can help ulcers. It can help blood pressure. It can help pain," he said. "I know when I was in the hospital, humor really helped."

As a teen, he would go to the local theaters to watch the classic comedic antics of Laurel and Hardy, Harold Lloyd, Charlie Chaplin, the Marx Brothers, Ben Turpin, Buster Keaton and the Three Stooges.

"They were certainly some of the first dispensers of early laughter and good humor on film," writes Deacon Lowe in the introduction to his book.

The deacon suggests that using humor during a sermon is a perfect way to grab parishioners’ attention.

"These people, when they come to church, they’ve got so many problems. Not like 90 years ago. It’s a lot different," he said. "So they come into church and what they want is something to calm their stress. And if a priest or a deacon tells a story, he has their attention and then he can do whatever sermon that he can that will help them."

Deacon Lowe includes tips for becoming "a pro" at telling jokes such as:

— Keep it clean.

— Be relaxed and sensitive to your audience.

— Always smile.

— Take your time and exaggerate using body language.

— Never make any racial or sexist slurs.

— Give the punch line everything you have. Pause for anticipation and deliver it with a slightly raised voice.

Deacon Lowe met his wife, Ann, while the two were working in the big-band business. She was a singer and he played the drums.

After two years of dating, Don, who grew up Anglican, and Ann were married in the Episcopal Church. That was 64 years ago. They later joined the Catholic Church.

"We were remarried in the Catholic Church on our 25th anniversary, and Martin, our son, wanted to know if he was illegitimate all these years," quipped Deacon Lowe.

After serving as an extraordinary minister of holy Communion for several years in his parish, Deacon Lowe was ordained to the diaconate in 1977. He retired in 1989.

"I miss it. I can’t go on the altar anymore because of my knees and the possibility of falling," he said.

"But I go to Mass every morning and come close to the good Lord."

For about 40 years Deacon Lowe also used his sense of humor in his mail-order bow tie business, Lowe Bow Originals.

Deacon Lowe, who has worn bow ties his whole life, says he always had a hard time finding them.

His wife, an expert seamstress, decided to make a few for her husband. Orders for the handmade originals took off when The Wall Street Journal ran a front-page story about his business in 1996.

The Lowes sold the business in 1999 and finally retired.