But the time has come for me to express those feelings, if not just for my own emotional well-being.

For example, I admit now that I believe North Korea has been judged too harshly. If you check your "Guinness Book of World Records," you’ll note that there’s a reason for Kim Jong Il’s poor disposition. On Page 357, about half way down, you’ll see that the North Korean president has had the "Most Consecutive Bad Hair Days" of any person alive today.

I imagine you’d be bitter too. You might even be a dictator, if only at home or around the office. I’m sure you remember that Kim Jong Il broke Alfred Einstein’s record in 1950 when the former record-holder/physicist was disqualified for wearing a sombrero on casual Friday.

I often wonder where the world would be today if only Kim had had a good barber. (Sigh.)

And then there is that other subject that draws great consternation among nerds … er … science buffs like myself, the theory which states that Pluto is not actually a planet, but is instead a big bunch of gas. I really did sit in the chair on which Kansas farm boy Clyde Tombaugh was perched when he discovered Pluto on Feb. 18, 1930 in Flagstaff, Ariz. I’ve experienced planets; I sometimes live on one. And I’ve experienced big balls of gas. (You would too if you ever visited my Uncle Baxter.) And Pluto, my friends, IS a planet.

Then there’s that other theory, the one that maintains that Mickey Mouse’s pet dog Pluto isn’t a dog at all, but is instead a big bunch of gas. I’ve seen dogs, and I’ve seen big bunches of gas, once at the same time after feeding my dog leftover lasagna. And Pluto, my friends, is a dog.

And there are other subjects with which I take issue but choose not to address for obvious reasons. For example, I find insulting the notion some people put forth that Noah did not live to be more than 600 years old, as is clearly stated. It’s true: People lived for hundreds and even thousands of years back then.

Was it something in the water? Something in the air they breathed? I don’t know, but I’ll find out. Adam and Eve recently retired to a farmhouse near Kinsley. I’ll stop by tonight after supper. (By the way, if they ever invite you over, be sure and call first. You’ll want to know how to dress. And avoid bringing apple cobbler. Bad memories.)

And here we approach the subject of politics, the issue most Catholic editors avoid like soap. It’s very difficult to talk politics in a Catholic newspaper. First, many good Catholics have vastly different political viewpoints, and addressing these viewpoints may only result in alienating readers.

You see, I write neither as a Liberal or Conservative, Republican or Democrat. I am, as I’ve mentioned before, a Convertable, part Liberal, part Conservative. The Convertables were once known as the "Anti-Insanity Party." That was before Jack Pieperweid became head. Soon after his appointment, it was learned that on every full moon he thought he turned into a bottle of extra strength Maalox. With our friend’s best wishes in mind, we changed the name briefly to the "Pro-Insanity Party," which didn’t help matters at all.

To explain further, the Liberal side of me finds the current administration entirely unsuitable to run our country. Yet, my Conservative side feels that their combination of unique talents and skills would make them strangely apt at running a cafeteria style restaurant, such as "The Golden Corral."

What is left when all those subjects deemed too controversial to write about are avoided? A trip down memory lane or a look into my psyche, both of which are spattered with enough weirdness to make our world leaders look … well, normal.

It truly has been difficult writing these columns lately, I guess because the world is so haywire. I believe my anger and dismay come from Christ. He wants us to do everything we possibly can to achieve peace so people stop dying. And we as a human race seem to be clueless as to how to accomplish that task.

Please pray every day for all our world leaders, for all the young men and women fighting overseas, for the thousands of innocent victims of war, and that humanity will one day, finally and truly heed the words of our Lord.